Dictionary of the Far Left

By Shaun Tan

By Shaun Tan

Founder, Editor-in-Chief, and Staff Writer

26/7/2020

ANTI-RACISM

Racism, just in favor of the more historically-oppressed.

 

CANON

The writings and other works that are generally regarded as good, important, and worth studying, but which actually contribute to inequality by suggesting that some things are better than others.

 

CENTRIST

See NAZI

 

CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE

An ad hominem attack, but socially acceptable.

 

CLASSICAL LIBERAL

See NAZI

 

COLOR

The skin pigmentation of a person not classified as white.

COLORED PEOPLE

Extremely offensive term used only by racists to refer to non-white people.

COLOR, PEOPLE OF

The exact same thing as colored people, only more awkward and convoluted, and, for some reason, socially acceptable.

 

CONSERVATIVE

See NAZI

 

EQUITY

The idea that all people are equal, but some people are more equal than others. Achieved through ANTI-RACISM.

 

FEMALE

Outdated term suggesting a false gender binary, used only by transphobes.

 

GASLIGHTING

When someone makes you doubt your ideas or question your position.

 

GENETICS

Race science, thoroughly discredited.

 

INTERSECTIONALITY

When one form of victimhood isn’t enough.

 

MALE

Outdated term suggesting a false gender binary, used only by transphobes.

 

MICROAGGRESSION

Anything that’s not intended to be offensive, that’s not objectively offensive, but that you nonetheless feel offended by.

 

MODERATE

See NAZI

 

NAZI

Someone who supports racist, authoritarian government, basically anyone to the right of Elizabeth Warren.

 

PRIVILEGE

Original sin derived from whiteness, maleness, heterosexuality, or wealth.

 

SCREED

A speech or piece of writing you disagree with.

 

SILENCE

Forbearance from speech or noise.

If it results in failure to recite leftist orthodoxy – see VIOLENCE

 

SOCIALISM

The most successful system of social organization that has never really been tried before.

 

SPEECH

If you agree with it – The constitutionally-protected expression of ideas and thoughts by means of articulate vocal sounds.

If you disagree with it – see VIOLENCE

 

TRANSPHOBE

Anyone who doesn’t think you become whatever you identify as.

 

VICTIM

Someone who derives virtue from weakness or misfortune.

 

VIOLENCE

An unjust or unwarranted exertion of force or power, as against rights or laws.

If used in the service of a cause you agree with – see SPEECH